This is the most often asked and thought about question that many adults face when it comes to having children. The answer is normally some clinical aspect of parenting read or heard expressed from experts but the real answer is there is none. No one knows what type of parent that they will be which explains why parenting is one of the hardest jobs that anyone will ever take on. There are plenty of people out there who will try and tell you what kind of parent to be based on their trial and errors and there are many lessons that can be learned from their mistakes or success. There are those lessons to be learned from remembering your journey as a child but the most important thing that should be remembered is that the child is a part of you and the person you chose to create that bundle of joy.
It must be remembered that the knowledge and experience you have is not readily available to the child. Sometimes parents speak to a child as if they should know the things that they do and that are a mistake. No one exits the womb, knowing right from wrong or knowing as much as they come to learn later. Some parents choose to use a schedule of what the child should be doing at a certain age or should know and follow it as if it was gospel. It’s not. It’s only a guide and should not be a measure as to how much of a genius your child may or may not be. If your infant is not holding his/her head up at a certain time does not mean that your child is behind every other child. It only means that it has not become necessary for that infant yet.
I say use all that is available to you to shape your self into that parent that you want to be. You have to adapt to your surroundings to make any transition. Take the best of your parents, the best of your role models and the best of those you observe and make it your own. Know that you will make mistakes and be willing to admit to those if not for yourself, for your child. Nothing builds respect more than your child knowing that you are not perfect and make mistakes. It makes them feel less like a failure if they know that you have failed as well. There is nothing wrong with admittance of imperfection. The pedestal that you place yourself upon will be the one that your children will strive to meet and if that pedestal is too high for them to achieve, the result could be devastating.
What kind of parent will you be? The best that you can and if you do the best job that you can do, no one will ever be able to say any less. You may wish to be your child’s best friend but you really need to work on being that child’s parent more. If you can look at yourself and honestly say that you are doing the best job that you can, raising a child, then you are and more importantly your child will know it as well.