What ya’ll fixin’ to read is a diarrhea of words and a constipation of thoughts, so just grab the bull by the horns and git’r dun!
Texas has always been known to be “loud and proud,” so it comes as no surprise that Texans have developed their own lingo and language, sometimes dubbed “Texas Talk.”
For those who have grown up in or around Texas, the lingo comes as second nature. For outsiders, Texas Talk takes some getting used to and can seem as foreign as tumbleweeds on Christmas morning.
Now, let’s a take a look at some commonly, and not so commonly, used words and sayings by our fellow Texans.
Quite possibly the most stereotypical word used to represent Texans, commonly followed by “y’all.” Howdy is an informal greeting often used in place of “hi” or “hello.” It is a shortened form of “how do ye” or “how do you do?” Surprisingly though, this question form of a greeting is never answered since it may only confuse the other party but should be returned with a “howdy” or a simple head nod.
Example: Bob: “Howdy, pardner!”
Bill: “You must not be from ’round here son.”
Y’all is a contraction for “you all” or the northern term “you guys” often used to address two or more people. To pluralize this word, one can say “all y’all” which sounds a whole lot better than saying “youse guys.”
Example: Where y’all going?
No, nothing is broken but “fixin’ to” is about as Texan as beers and steers. The term implies that an action is about to take place or one is getting ready to do something. Oftentimes, there is more intent to do something than actually getting it done. “Fixin’ to” is more likely to be an action than saying “gonna.”
Example: I’m fixin’ to watch the game.
“Texas has four seasons: drought, flood, blizzard and twister”
This saying rings true due to the “sheer size [of the state] Texas experiences all kinds of weather-sometimes all at once,” according to the Texas Monthly Web site.
The weather in Texas is unpredictable and constantly changing. Some say if you don’t like the weather just wait five minutes, it’ll change. It is known to get “so hot the hens are laying hard-boiled eggs” or “so dry the catfish are carrying canteens.” The summers can be “hotter than a fur coat in Marfa” and the winters “colder than an ex-wife’s heart.” A general rule of thumb is to “never kick a turd on a hot day” when “it’s hotter than a stolen tamale.”
In Texas, this word is used as a general term to refer to any type of soft drink. Pepsi, Dr. Pepper, Sprite. Similar to the north where sodas are referred to as “pop,” it’s all “Coke” here.
Example: Waitress: “So, what would y’all like to drink?”
Waitress: “What kind?”
Bob: “Dr. Pepper.”
The now infamous, annoying saying made famous by “Larry the Cable Guy” has spread to the masses and has been used and abused, time and time again. The phrase is “a statement of support, encouragement or respect. It is used to define a moment to come, a moment that passed or a dream one hopes to come true,” according to the Urban Dictionary. The phrase is so versatile. It is often used anytime to answer any question: yes, no, sure, why not, traffic jams, sporting events, NASCAR, relationships. The possibilities are endless.
“Big as all hell and half of Texas”
This saying basically reinforces the motto that everything is bigger in Texas. This “fact” can and will be disputed by some but when one is able to refer to something as “Texas-sized,” rest assured it may be “big as Brewster County” or “big as a Brahma bull.” So yes, it is that big.
It’s a fact, Texans are proud. Very proud. Proud of anything and everything. Whether it be that perfect barbecued brisket, “them Cowboys” or the new lift kit on the pickup, Texans are loud and proud to the point of being overly boastful. Being too boastful is not a good thing as some folks will say “he’s all hat, no cattle” or “all broth, no beans.” The worst could possibly be to “think the sun rises just to hear him crow.” Being proud is one thing, but being obnoxious is a whole ‘nother story.
“She’s two sandwiches short of a picnic”
Or maybe just has a few loose screws. For those who think all of us down south are a bunch of hicks and hillbillies, we have a few battle words of our own. Warning: use these idioms at your own risk.
One could look “like she fell face-down in a sticker patch and cows ran over her” or be “so country he thinks a seven-course meal is a possum and a six pack.” That crazy uncle may have a “big hole in his screen door” or perhaps his “porch light’s on but no one is home.” Either way, the saying “don’t mess with Texas” rings true as you shouldn’t mess with Texans, especially if they’re chewing tobacco. It could get real nasty, real quick.
So whether you’re ridin’ high at your first rodeo or a seasoned veteran, one will be quick to realize that the thing some call “Texas Talk” is only one facet of Texas culture. The “loud and proud” pride Texans feel towards Texas and all that it encompasses is the real clincher since you’ll be hard-fetched to find any other citizens as proud of where they came from. Git’r dun!
Dingus, Anne. www.texasmonthly.com/1000-01-01/webextra35.php/ Texas Monthly.
Rowe, Rick. www.urbandictionary.com/define.php. Urban Dictionary.