Child abuse is an unfortunate reality, and most of us have had at least one experience of knowing about a child being abused. Contrary to popular mythology, it’s not just “bad” or “crazy” people who abuse children. Parents get overwhelmed and begin to neglect their children’s needs; a stressful divorce can lead to physical abuse. In short, regardless of the external appearance of the parent, they can become an abuser, and abusers come in all shapes, personalities, social classes, and colors. Trust your instincts if you believe a child you know may be being abused. Here are some telltale warning signs.
Warning Signs of Child Neglect
-The child is passive, too compliant, or withdrawn from school and friends
-The child’s clothes are tattered or the child wears the same clothes several days in a row
-The child has poor hygiene
-The child is losing weight or does not appear to be eating
-The child comes to school (or other activities) early and stays late
-Parents are late picking up the child or do not pick the child up at all
-Is often absent from school or other activities
Warning Signs of Emotional or Psychological Child Abuse
-child exhibits extremes in behavior: either overly obedient and fearful, or very aggressive and bullying. May go back and forth between these extremes
-is either too emotionally mature (acts like an adult) or too emotionally immature (acts much younger than he or she actually is)
-seems indifferent to, or afraid of his or her parent
-is overly apologetic when he or she gets in trouble
-seems afraid of breaking the rules or earning disapproval
-has trouble making friends
-becomes overly attached very quickly- to teachers, friends, or other nonparental figures. The child may be trying to form an attachment with a “safe” person who is not the parent.
Warning Signs of Physical Child Abuse
-The child seems to have a lot of unexplained injuries. Especially noteworthy are injuries that children don’t usually sustain- burns, bitemarks, and other injuries that aren’t sustained in normal childhood activities
-The child wears long sleeved clothes in even hot weather (she may be trying to cover up injuries)
-Is absent from school and then shows up with faded bruises or other injuries
-Seems afraid of his or her parent
-Overreacts to being in trouble: a correction from a teacher provokes tears, or the child seems afraid that misbehavior will lead to getting hurt
Warning Signs of Sexual Child Abuse and Child Molestation
-has an STD at a young age or becomes pregnant
-has difficulty walking or sitting
-is sexually inappropriate with other children or overly sexual
-seems to have age inappropriate sexual knowledge (knows about oral sex or anal sex at a very young age, for example)
-Sudden nightmares or bedwetting
It is important to note that the person most likely to abuse a child is the child’s parent. However, there may be someone else abusing the child- a teacher, grandparent, family friend, etc. If a child you know exhibits several of these symptoms, he or she may be being abused by someone in their life. To help a child or get help figuring out how to help them, you can contact the National Child Abuse Hotline at: 1-800-4-A-Child. I have also written an article that provides an overview of what to do when you suspect child abuse here: http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/2617409/what_to_do_when_you_witness_suspect.html?cat=25
Remember that your first priority is to care for and protect the child. Do not be concerned about embarrassing the parent or other caretaker, and act quickly to help the child you are concerned about.
sources:
Child Welfare Information Gateway
RAINN
www.helpguide.org
