Social networking is bringing people together like never before. It’s possible to find almost anyone from anywhere in the world if they are signed up for a social networking site. However, are there some people you really shouldn’t try to find and hook up with again? What about people you were previously in a relationship with or someone you have dated or slept with in the past? Is it a good idea to “befriend” these people on social networking?
The real answer depends on the type of person you are, the type of person they are and the type of relationship you had together. How the relationship ended could also be a factor. Just like any decision, the pros and cons should be weighed before you go clicking on that “accept” button.
Here are some pros to hooking up online with someone you once had a romantic relationship with:
• See how they are doing now
• Apologize for something you may have done or how you may have hurt them in some way
• Clear the air if the relationship ended badly
• Be friends again
• To consider being more than friends again
And of course, there are also cons to a decision like this and some of these include:
• That person doesn’t want to talk to you
• Your spouse or current significant other may be jealous
• You may be tempted if you still care for the person and are currently in a relationship
• It may bring up feelings or memories of pain that were involved in the relationship
If you are single, the decision is all yours to make when it comes to looking up old lovers on social networking sites. To help you determine your answer, consider why it is you want to talk with them again. What is the purpose behind befriending them?
If you are currently in a relationship, you may want to also consider your partner when it comes to befriending old lovers on social networking sites. Do you have a trusting relationship where your partner would not be offended or jealous of the relationship with an old lover? Does your partner know about this person from your past and how significant was the relationship between you?
If you have trust issues in your relationship, especially those that directly pertain to past lovers or Internet use, it may be a wise idea to hold off befriending these people. For example, if you have cheated on your partner with an old lover in the past, adding them (or others) to your Facebook is a recipe for disaster.
If you can have a healthy relationship with a person you were once involved with in an intimate way, then there’s no real reason why you shouldn’t meet up with them on social networking sites if you both want to. However, if there are negative feelings that come with it, if you’re just trying to “get them back” or obsess over who they’re with now and what they’re doing now, then it might be best to just leave it alone and move on. Besides, there are plenty of other people online to be friends with, right?