Being successful in dating is a little more complicated than just fixing a dating mistake here or making an adjustment there. Charm and charisma comes from having a solid confident mindset gained through experience. But how will you get this experience and confidence if without consistently getting beyond your first date? Here are 10 dating mistakes and tips for men to make their first date a success.
1. Keep the bill simple: I am NOT telling you to get used by women. What I am saying is, don’t make the dating mistake of turning money into a big issue. Keep in mind that many women consider a “date” less of a “date” if the guy isn’t the one paying. If she offers to pay, great! If she doesn’t, don’t make a big deal out of it. An easy way out of this is to offer something along the lines of “I got it, you can get dessert/drinks/movies/whatever”.
2. Staying at one location: Going along with the line from above, you should highly consider more than one venue for a first date. This gives your first date the impression of multiple dates and you will both feel like you have known each other for a longer time. Therefore, if your coffee date goes well, you might want to offer continuing your conversation at the bowling alley.
3. Not making a move: Believe it or not, women are not mind readers. Even the most beautiful women can have doubts about whether a guy likes them or not. For most women, hints and signs are the furthest that they will go and the rest is up to you. You don’t want to end the first date at the same place you started now do you?
4. Talking too much: Women (actually, people in general) love to talk about themselves. If you don’t want to stress yourself out about what to talk about next, ask questions that will get your date to talk. You do not want to be that guy that the girl couldn’t get to shut up on a first date.
5. Looking sloppy and generally unattractive: “Blah blah blah, I wouldn’t want to date a shallow chick anyways”. Whatever. Guys like pretty girls, so what makes you think women don’t like handsome men. I’m not telling you to get ready to strut the catwalk, but make yourself presentable. Get some clothes that fit, shave if you have to, look appropriate according to the situation and person you’re going out with, and brush your teeth. You may not have given an impression yet to the girl you met on the treadmill at the gym, so take your chance to make a good impression on the first date.
6. “Umm… I don’t know, what do you want to do?”: Please do NOT make this dating mistake. Know what you want and don’t waste other’s people’s time. When you asked that cute girl at Starbucks if she’d like to grab some coffee sometimes, she is expecting to get to know you, not spend 30 minutes deciding where she wants to have lunch.
7. Being too nice: Nice is boring. Tease your date. Call her out on her BS. Disagree with her. Don’t make the dating mistake of being boring. People in general like a challenge and they tend to value the things that they have worked for
8. Chivalry is not dead: It is just used incorrectly. Do not be chivalrous with a hidden agenda. There isn’t a secret number of doors that you must open for her to open her legs heart. Do it because you are awesome and that is just how you are. If that is not how you are, then pretend that is how you are. ß contradictory.
9. Maintain eye contact: This is indicates a lack of confidence and that is definitely not something that you want to convey on a first date. It can also come off as uninterested, scared, shy, disrespectful and other adjectives with negative connotations. If you are having trouble maintaining eye contact, try to concentrate your focus between her eyes, she won’t know the difference. Note: I do not recommend staring at her like it’s nobody’s business, that’s just creepy.
10. Choosing a bad location for a first date: A lot of guys will tell you that dinner is a bad place for a first date because it is too cliché and awkward, while other guys will tell you that dinner is a great way to get to know someone. Some people will tell you that a movie is a bad for a first date because you don’t pay attention to each other, while others will tell you that the movies are a great opportunity to make a move. The bottom line: pick a location that you are comfortable with. If you’re a great conversationalist, go have dinner or coffee with her, if not, then I suggest a location that involves more action and less talking such as bowling. Or a lot of vodka, that works too.